We interrupt this blog.....

... For a rant.

Right now I'm sitting on the loo, watching Wimblydon tennis on the iPlayer and updating my blog.  I appreciate that this isn't ground-breaking enough to interrupt such an interesting blog (sic), but it's my blog and I'll cry if I want to.

Actually, before I cry, I will just say that it's amazing that I can sit on the loo, watch tennis and update my blog, and all at the same time.  A couple of years ago blogs didn't exist*.  A few years before that there were only three channels, and you needed a specially designed small particle accelerator called a "tellybob" to watch anything.  A few years before that Wimblydon tennis didn't exist.  And there was a time when you just dug a hole in the ground.

About the same time they invented tennis at Wimblydon, they also discovered that Type 1 Diabetics need insulin to live.  I presume they were different theys, otherwise they were even cleverer than I thought. It took the Diabetes-them another 20 years to make the stuff, which was unashamedly stolen from animals that had to die for the privilege.  Up until then people who developed the disease would experience a period of extreme lethargy, hunger like never before and unexplained weight loss, no matter how many donuts they ate.  This was accompanied by an unbelievable urge to drink and a constant need to pee even more than they could drink.  What followed was a combination of (in no particular order) incontinence, impotence, blindness, kidney failure, nerve pain, amputation & heart failure, almost certainly resulting in coma.  Eventually after weeks, months or years (depending on how lucky/unlucky they were), they'd be put out of their misery.  Being diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes was a certain grizzly death sentence back in those days.

Now it's an uncertain but potentially grizzly death sentence**.

It's good to be alive now.  I must remember this.

PS * Blogs only exist because of the web, which was invented at CERN.  The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) at CERN is basically a particle accelerator, albeit slightly larger and more expensive than the average tellybob. Hadron is an anagram of hard-on.  Men with Type 1 Diabetes are entitled to two little blue pills a month free on prescription due to their lack of hardons.  It's a small world***.

PS** I bought a book written by Diabetics for Diabetics.  The cheerful introduction ended with the sentence "Now that so many improvements have been made, our hope is to die of something that ISN'T related to Diabetes".  I wonder if one of the preferred methods of death includes being repeatedly hit around the head with a book on Diabetes.

PPS *** Today it was announced that the Higgs Boson was discovered at the LHC, although I must confess that the lovely Mario (who will remain anonymous for obvious reasons) told me about this when I visited CERN last month.  Anagrams of The Higgs Boson include Bongos Thighs, Hot Hog Bigness, and, my personal favourite, Oh Shits Be Gong.  They should have called it the Nambu-Brout-Englert-Higgs-Hagen-Guralnik-Kibble Boson. You can make a whole load of rude words from that, although there's a distict lack of 'C's, which is a shame.